Coffee Compatibility

While stumbling last night I came across an article entitled, "What Your Taste in Coffee Says About You." Now, if I had written this piece it would have been two sentences long:

"Your taste in coffee signifies your need to drag your ass to work after a long night of drinking. By the way, where is that coffee?"

In all seriousness, though, the article was interesting even though it's not entirely scientific to analyze how coffee choices reflect different personality traits. According to the author, as someone who allows her coffee to cool I am the type of person who, "refuses to be driven or pressurised [sic] knows what they like, and is prepared to wait for it. They may be "fussy" in their tastes, but they don't make demands on others." That's complete BS. I make lots of demands on others.

The article closes with a paragraph that both dates the material, and terrifies this reader. It asserts, "Finally, it is revealed the millennium will see the current coffee sensation heightening. Donna predicts: "As we approach the millennium we will be reaching out more to other people and engage in more conversation. There will also be more thought and emotion - sharing and coffee will help us do this."

This guy obviously never saw Twitter coming.

It got me thinking, though, whether there is anything to be said for, "coffee compatibility." Since we're talking junk science, anyway, we may as well have a little fun. Can a black drinker ever be happy with someone who likes hers light and sweet? Can a hazelnut ever love a French vanilla? All I know is that I take mine with 1/2 a Splenda and soy milk while my boyfriend prefers tea and we've never had any philosophical debates on the topic.

I wonder what the new millennium will bring.