Wednesday, April 7, 2010


In a perfect world, your significant other should be that person you think is niftiest of all; the one guy or girl you've come across who is as close to perfection as anyone's going to get. The missing piece to the puzzle that is you.

OK, so how many of us are living in a perfect world? That's what I thought.

In reality we do the best with what we get in life; if you're very lucky you will find someone whose quirks complement yours and who doesn't mind your shortcomings. (Lord knows I have quite a few, and some of them are pretty off-putting, if I do say so myself.) If you're super-duper-mega lucky, that person will also be someone you find attractive and who finds you attractive in return. Be lucky enough to get to this point and you may as well forget about buying that fistful of lottery tickets, because you've already hit the jackpot.

It's so easy, in life and in relationships, to focus on what's lacking rather than what's there. She never rinses her dishes. He refuses to clip his nails in the bathroom. Make a list of all of the things your SO does that annoy you or gross you out. Go ahead, write everything down, and don't hold back. Once you've finished the list, write this title on the top of the paper, "List of Things I Happily Accept Because Any List Made About Me Would Be About Eighty Times Longer."

People aren't puzzle pieces. You can't use force to jam someone into an empty space in your make-up. The edges never align perfectly and, gosh, it just takes so much effort that would be better spent on loving each other, incomplete and imperfect as you both are.


  1. I have to tell you that you get wiser with each entry. This one is the truest of them all, so far. What makes this even more complex is that there is so much pressure to find the PERFECT person, and even to change the person you're with already until they fit into the perfect mold . . . why can't we just tell the truth about relationships instead of putting a magical glow on them?

  2. Thank you for this. Absolutely true. Amazingly well said.